Lyrics
I’m Not Sitting at the Kids Table This Year (revised)
5-15-2019
Revised 8-8-2023
By Mike Whiteley
Ch
I’m not sitting at the kid’s table this year
I’m 41 years old, I think the time is finally here
It ain’t easy being Thankful with some brat crying in your ear
I’m not sitting at the kid’s table this year
V
Last year I sat beside my 3rd cousin
I had to pull a long green bean out of his nose
I think he was Thankful, but I wasn’t
‘Cause then he yarked some sweet potatoes on my clothes
When Grandma finally told me it was my turn
I showed up for dinner 12 o’clock
But, just like the stuffing, man, I got burned
When my Uncle Willie’s new wife took my spot
Ch
I’m not sitting at the kid’s table this year
I’m 43 years old, I think the time is finally here
It ain’t easy being Thankful in a Sponge Bob atmosphere
No, I’m not sitting at the kid’s table this year
V
For Pete’s sake man look at my Great Aunt Mabel
I think she was at the first Thanksgiving Day
My knees are holding up this folding table
She’s sittin’ way up there while someone fills her plate
And my Great Grandma has got to be a hundred
And I know that what I’m thinkin’s really wrong
I swear I hope she’s ok but I’ve wondered
Is it natural for folks to live so long?
Ch
I’m not sitting at the kid’s table this year
I’m 45 years old, I think the time is finally here
It ain’t easy being Thankful dining with the Mousketeers
I’m not sitting at the kid’s table this year
Br
Look at all those Geezers and the food that they keep piling
Someday I’ll make it over there I swear
And when I look down at the kids, you know that I’ll be smiling
‘Til then I’m in a child sized folding chair
Ch
I’m not sitting at the kid’s table this year
I’m 48 years old, I think the time is finally here
I’d be a lot more thankful if these brats would disappear
I’m not sitting at the kid’s table this year
I’ll probl’y be a hundred before I’m sitting over there
I guess I’m sitting at the kid’s table this year